


A Mirror, in Two Parts

by Loudest_Voice



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Multi, Politics, What-If, adding tags as I go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-20
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2018-02-26 08:15:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 18,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2644646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loudest_Voice/pseuds/Loudest_Voice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The world hasn't really changed but his place in it has.</p><p>Or . . . the one where Kakashi turns out to be an Uchiha bastard, which changes <em>everything</em>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The things you daydream while trying not to cry because you've been staring down a microscope in the brightest setting for eight hours straight. I'm planning to continue it without a plan and see how far I get.

Kakashi wakes up sluggishly, unable to tell where he is or who exactly might be around him. Someone has laid a hand over his forehead. It's a more worrying sign than the burning ache blistering through his eyeballs because, like all ninja worth the ink their rank is written with, he's trained himself to slip from deep sleep to full alertness instantly. Especially when he's off in enemy territory.

"Kakashi," Minato-sensei's voice says.

Before celebrating, Kakashi forces his chakra to cooperate, feels out for genjutsu or any other sign that he's been captured and is currently being interrogated. There's Minato-sensei's life force, vibrant as any star. Rin's the one over him - either waking him or treating a seizure. Post-ictal confusion is a thing. Why else would it take him so long to notice his own team, including Obito, though he's only hovering behind Minato-sensei like usual.

"I'm fine," he says, mostly so Minato-sensei hears him. "Rin, please give me a second." He'd push her away but there are _rules_.

When she slides away, Kakashi surveys his own body as though he's woken up alone. Airway: intact. Air goes in and out of his lungs without problems. Breathing: appropriate. His chest wall expands and he doesn't feel the panicky edge brought about by lack of oxygen. The scent of an oily Kusa forest wafts under his nose. Heart rate: good, or not fucked up enough that it's bothering him. Pain: nothing besides the strange burning in his eyes.

Kakashi opens his eyes, allows a second of relief when moving them doesn't hurt, and then another when tree branches and stubborn rays of bright sunlight sneaking through a thick canopy are visible. Time to check for occult injuries.

Getting up doesn't hurt so Kakashi starts systematically assessing range of motion in all his joints as he tries to remember what happened. Kannabi bridge. Mission accomplished, as far as he remembers, though with a couple of close calls. Obito even awakened Sharingan, for all the good it did in the end. Kakashi still had to use Chidori, which must have worked despite Minato-sensei's warnings to the contrary. How else would they all be alive?

He's by his left elbow when Minato-sensei clears his throat, prompting Kakashi to finally scan his team. He doesn't expect to find injuries because Rin's _that_ good even if she has a stupid habit of trying to engage him in silly small talk no matter how rude he is. But they're all staring at him like . . . like something's very wrong. Even Obito, who should be bragging up a storm about Sharingan.

"What?"

"Kakashi . . ." Minato-sensei starts again, looking away at the last moment, just like Rin does when she's trying and failing to work up the courage to ask him out on a date.

" _What_?" repeats Kakashi. He's fine (minus some annoying eye issues), Kannabi Bridge is destroyed, an enemy jounin is down, and they even have a new Sharingan in Konoha, never mind it belongs to the stupidest chuunin alive.

"You have Sharingan," says Obito.

The words don't register.

Then they do and Kakashi frowns. His ears don't hurt and his hearing doesn't appear impaired. Birds are chirping without a care in the world and there's water flowing not far to the East. But human language is complex and difficulty with certain speech sounds is one of the first signs of hearing loss.

"What?"

"You should not have been able to use Chidori without hurting yourself," Minato-sensei starts, "and Rin says you've recently forced so much chakra into your eyes that your retina should've hemorrhaged."

"My chakra control's excellent - "

" - I saw your eyes," insists Obito.

"I'm not a fucking Uchiha," says Kakashi, too irritated to care he's not bothering to even entertain whatever Minato-sensei's trying to say. His head's beginning to pound, though nowhere as bad as his stupid, perfectly _ordinary_ eyeballs.

"Kakashi . . ." Rin tries to step closer to him.

"Don't!" snaps Kakashi, rubbing his forehead with both hands. Things had gotten clear all of a sudden during his last fight, but that was just getting in the zone, driven mostly by a creeping certainty that death was snapping at his heels. It'd looked like Obito had managed to get his ass handed to him again, brand new Sharingan all but useless, and then Rin screamed. Or something. Kakashi had known Chidori, defective or not, was his - _their_ \- only shot so yes, he _did_ push chakra into his eyes . . .

But if every ninja who pushed chakra to their eyes in a moment of desperation got a doujutsu out of it, then the stupid things wouldn't be Konoha's most priced bloodlines.

"I guess your father was a cuckold too," says Obito.

And Kakashi's going to punch the words back down his idiot throat, just as soon as he gets Minato-sensei, who cares if Obito's eyes are red. Sharingan or not, a halfway decent genin could still wipe the floor with Obito -

" _Kakashi_!" Minato-sensei twists his arm over his head, pulls tight enough Kakashi feels it in his socket. "Calm down or I'll knock you out."

Kakashi breathes. _A shinobi must follow his commander's instructions._

It's not just Obito's eyes that are red.

"Fuck," mutters Kakashi.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I'm writing one of these every day now?

Minato plans to be Yondaime. Sandaime, the village elders, the villagers, and even the Clan Heads (though begrudgingly) are planning that Minato will be Yondaime.

So Minato has been paying extra attention to intravillage politics (which at least in Konoha is practically synonymous with Clan politics). Everyone helps, of course, but Konoha owes its hold on Fire Country to the Uchiha and the Hyuuga. They're more Konoha's arms than its eyes; an analogy he prefers ever since Rin offhandedly told him about Alien Hand Syndrome. Both the Uchiha and the Hyuuga are essential, but every once in a while, they try to choke Konoha. Or knife each other in the wrists.

Sooner or later (probably sooner, considering Sandaime's been itching for a break) Minato will be the one dealing with them, and since he's got no significant connection to either clan (or the Senju), the task might just drive him to early retirement. Which, for a Kage, would be an early grave. Well . . . he _had_ no significant connections to either clan. Obito's a sweet kid, but his standing among the Uchiha is. . . not good. Even Sharingan might not change that much, in all honesty.

Minato orders his team straight back to his house the moment they reach Konoha. Not even Kakashi argues, though Minato can't tell if he's obeying out of respect to a sensei or respect to Konoha's jounin commander. Either way, no one demands they report back to the Tower immediately.

Kushina's off on a mission, which might be for the best no matter how badly Minato wants to bury his face in her red hair and breathe until his thoughts quiet down. His wife would notice the air of stricken gloom hanging about his team and she's hardly the best person to handle sensitive situations. Though Minato can't pretend he has the faintest idea how she would react at the news that Kakashi - _Kakashi_ \- is apparently. . . _undeniably_ an Uchiha bastard.

"Wait here while I freshen up," says Minato, making sure he sounds like they're out on the field and thus expects the order to be carried out unless it'll kill one of them.

There's the risk that Kakashi. . . or Obito will freak out and leave, but considering how they look (Kakashi's gaze has been fixed on the ground since he outwardly calmed down, and Obito has never gone so long without saying _something_ ), Minato's willing to risk it.

"Rin," he adds, "I'm injured, so come help me."

Rin nods but they boys don't so much as twitch, not even when Rin follows Minato out of the living room. Obito might not have heard, but Kakashi most likely recognizes the bullshit excuse to speak to Rin alone. Minato can't tell if it's a good sign that doesn't seem to care one way or another.

"How're their eyes?" asks Minato the moment he's sure no one's eavesdropping.

Rin hesitates, her brown eyes doing a quick scan of his body, almost like she wants to make sure Minato's not hiding some real injury. And then she grunts again, looks somewhere beyond Minato's shoulder, her forehead creased and mouth tight.

"I have their best interests in mind," Minato reassures her, and it's perfectly true. There's no reason why their best interests can't also be _Konoha's_ best interests.

"They're both complaining of mild retro-orbital, non-radiating, burning pain bilaterally," says Rin, shoulders tense and gaze still focused away from Minato's eyes. "But they're both denying changes in vision. . . no decreased acuity, double vision, blurriness, dizziness, flashing lights. . . nothing."

"But?" prompts Minato.

"On physical exam," continues Rin, "they both have diffuse retinal inflammation bilaterally. And people with compromised retina _should_ have vision changes. . . but I can't be sure. Uchihas don't come to the hospital for eye problems, so I just don't know if what I'm looking at is normal or not. Their pupils are equal, round, and reactive, and there's no evidence of nystagmus, so there's that, I guess." She shrugs, so Minato's going to go right ahead and assume that last bit of info doesn't satisfy her, though it sounds like good news.

"The Uchiha medics will see to Obito," says Minato.

"And Kakashi?" Rin finally stares at him right in the eyes.

"We'll make sure he's taken care of too." Minato keeps his voice firm. It looks bad for Kakashi, he knows, but with some delicate maneuvering, they can turn this into a victory for everyone.

Though a bittersweet one, even for Rin. Kakashi no longer has the freedom to be with whatever woman strikes his fancy, not that Rin had managed to do so yet. Now she'll have to give up hope. Minato would cling to some platitude about childhood crushes rarely maturing into anything serious, but considering he married the first woman who caught his eye, and when he was a whooping ten years old. . . Rin would just hear hypocrisy if it came from him.

They go back inside, find Kakashi and Obito on their respective spots, both not acknowledging each other's presence, and then Minato excuses himself to "freshen up". He could have just said he needed some time to think, or even nothing at all, but he might as well use all opportunities to practice diplomacy.

Swearing his team to secrecy about Kakashi's Sharingan is an option, except it'd be like digging out a hidden treasure just to dump it back out in the ocean. Kakashi is painfully loyal to Konoha, and the village desperately needs someone in that clan they trust unquestionably (the same could be said about the Hyuuga, but since a Byakuugan hasn't just fallen into Minato's lap, he'll put that aside for the moment).

Kakashi is also painfully brilliant, in a way that leaves even Minato breathless sometimes. The Uchiha will at least make a show of welcoming him with open arms once the embarrassment of his having a Sharingan in the first place blows over. Then, with a bit of patience and some well worded platitudes at the right times, Kakashi could. . . it'd be no different than any long term infiltration mission, albeit one with no clearly defined goals or parameters.

His team has never engage in such a mission. Hell, _Minato_ has never engaged in such a mission because Sandaime has been bestowing him with more responsibilities, both as training for taking over the job and because Sandaime has been growing tired. Probably from the moment Orochimaru betrayed him. Point is, it's easy for Minato to minimize what "long term infiltration" (killing yourself slowly, from the inside out is how he heard an old ANBU describe it once) actually is.

Kakashi's a resilient kid; he wouldn't have made jounin otherwise. Flexible too, but if you bend someone far enough, they never go back to their original shape. Not so different than breaking them, and maybe worse depending on who you ask.

Good thing Kushina's not around because she'd talk him into doing the right thing. And the right thing. . .

The right thing.

Minato goes back to his team wearing a mask of confidence and equanimity. He smiles at Obito, who would be celebrating his coming of age if only his rival hadn't taken the one thing that would've given him an unique role in the team. Minato feels for him - the kid isn't bad as far as chuunin go; he's even above average despite his issues with attention, at least when compared to anyone besides Kakashi. But there's just no time to be nursing his ego when a proverbial Exploding Tag is about to fall on Konoha's lap.

"Kakashi," says Minato, "we have to report your Sharingan to Hokage-sama."

"Obviously," mumbles Kakashi, which makes Rin burrow into herself.

". . .I have to tell. . . my clan," says Obito.

Rin doesn't say a word.

"Our clan," says Kakashi, almost tasting the words. He's still staring at the ground.

Obito starts to say something, then bites his lips and scrunches up even more than Rin.

Minato doubts Kakashi's developed a sudden yearning for family. "Alright then," he says. "To the Tower."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still at tumblr, etc. Too lazy to c+p the link again.


	3. Chapter 3

Contrary to what the bastard's probably thinking, Obito's not _jealous_ of Kakashi's brand new - sweet merciful hell - _Sharingan_.

Well, maybe he is but he's only human.

Mostly, he just can't stop thinking of what Kakashi's life will be like if. . . when he has to join the Uchiha. There are expectations, a lot of them frustratingly contradictory. Be an excellent ninja. Put your family ahead of everything, even your own life. Excel, but don't make your cousins look bad. Make sure the village knows our family is essential. Don't go around doing favors for the villagers, or they'll assume they can walk all over you. Be assertive. Don't contradict your elders.

And for the clansmen, _do not fuck any woman unless you're married to her_. The Clan elders decide who marries who and when. Of course.

Kakashi technically has not disobeyed any of these order, but he's living, breathing evidence that _someone_ did. He's an outsider. He always will be.

Though he's also scarily brilliant, even more so than Shisui. Some would argue, anyway. For all Obito knows, Kakashi's about to become one of the many cousins constantly reminding him he's an embarrassment to the Uchiha name.

They're in Sandaime-sama's waiting chamber, ignoring a team of administrative chuunin and not looking at each other while Minato-sensei reports to Hokage-sama ahead of them. Rin hasn't tried to speak to Kakashi, not even when they weren't under other people's nose. She's also standing away from him, for once respecting the mile-wide radius of what Kakashi considers his personal space. She's smart, undoubtedly figured out Kakashi has been reduced to a political pawn who won't be able to choose his shirts, much less his wife.

Obito isn't the most prominent of Uchiha clansmen, to say the least. His eyes are dark as starless sky (like Kakashi's, come to think of it) so even though he didn't awaken Sharingan (until now), the elders still see him as a pawn in the genetic chess game that masquerades as the Uchiha family tree. But he'd been so certain that if he could convince a sensible, healthy girl to have him, his family wouldn't have objected to a marriage.

Rin never paid him much mind, true; but he'd still hoped that if he was around for long enough, she'd get over her frankly irritating crush on Kakashi. Or if Kakashi ever ejected his head from his ass and gave her the time of day, then he could just look for someone else. He wasn't ugly or anything, and there were probably civilian girls who would die at the thought of bagging an Uchiha, even if it wasn't a particularly important one.

It seems so stupid now.

"Asshole, we need to talk," he says, fighting the urge to bury his face in his hands.

Rin straightens, glances between them like a rabbit confused about whether she should freeze or run. And she's usually so calm and steady, even when faced with his and Kakashi's spats. And they _are_ spats, though Kakashi has a nasty habit of coating his petty taunts with fancy vocabulary, regulatory minutia not even Sandaime-sama himself bothered to memorize, and supercilious, _patronizing_ glares. Obito almost always ends up falling for it, but that doesn't mean he doesn't see right through the bullshit.

"I'm not in the mood for you right now," says Kakashi.

Obito doesn't bother to respond. He just heads for the door, confident that Kakashi's not about to let his stupid, impulsive, untalented, and clumsy teammate huff out with knowledge that could compromise him. Hopefully, Rin will choose to stay behind, but Obito doesn't really care if she's around to hear what he wants to say.

Kakashi catches up to him just as Obito spots the door to a public bathroom, which is hardly the most ideal place for a private conversation, but it'll have to do. When Kakashi grabs his shoulder, Obito uses his own momentum to push them through the single door. Luckily, the place smells inoffensive enough (at least he won't have to endure the aroma of some stranger's shit while trying to keep his temper under control as Kakashi unleashes what's probably the worst mood on earth all over him).

"For _once_ in your life," starts Kakashi, "just don't make life worse for the smarter people who've been saddled with you."

It's not like _he's_ the one who came up with the idiot tradition of sticking the top student in a class on the same team as the barely functional fool.

"I just. . ." Obito bites his lower lip, catches a glimpse of his dumb orange goggles on the bathroom mirror, and rips them off with an impatient grunt. They just annoyed him when he activated h-his. . . _his_ Sharingan, the way oily glass is irritating when it blocks a beautiful view. No one wonder his cousins always turn up their nose at him.

"We need to go back," says Kakashi, beginning to turn around.

"Don't do it!" Obito rushes out, scared that he's missed a tiny window to get through Kakashi's titanium skull. There's no way Obito can force him to listen, not even if Kakashi _didn't_ have a shiny new Sharingan of his own.

But Kakashi chooses to pause mid-turn just to shoot Obito a faintly disgusted glare.

"Just keep it a secret," Obito breathes. "Rin won't say anything. I won't either and I'm sure if you tell Minato-sensei you don't want to. . ." Kakashi's never responded well to mentions of his father. Not his father. Whatever. "You. . . trust me, you don't want to be some pseudo-Uchiha clansman. It - "

"They'll probably be happier with me than they've ever been with you," interrupts Kakashi, somehow managing to look down his nose at Obito even though he's a full head shorter. He's out of the room before Obito can begin to formulate a come back, much less an argument to get him to _listen_

Obito punches his own reflection, then winces when glass slices through his knuckles. His heart's beating in his throat. His lungs are trapped under his ribs. He slides onto the floor, his back to the wall, and refuses to let the tears gathering in his eyes fall.

Why does he even care, anyway? Kakashi never appreciated a single thing the world gave him. Not his freedom, insofar as he was just a Konoha shinobi among many with no clan legacy crushing him down. Not the brains that let him master practically every jutsu thrown at him. Not Rin's affection. Or Minato-sensei's genuine respect. He's always walking around with that dumb mask, never mind most people would love to see him smile. Everyone sure pays rapt attention whenever he deigns to talk.

And now he'll have to contend with Uchiha Madara's legacy while trying to keep the village from crumbling under Kusa's onslaught. Obito gives it a month before he looks are ragged as Shisui.

Or maybe not. Kakashi might just fit right in with Obito's asshole family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I guess I'm really posting one of these every day now.


	4. Chapter 4

After the meeting with Sandaime-sama, which lasts all of five minutes, an Uchiha medic accompanied by two police officers comes to get Obito. And Kakashi.

Rin tries not to seethe even though they're her teammates. And even more importantly, her _patients_. She doesn't give a flying fuck about Sharingan, but she would like to know how her _patients_ are doing. Expert or not, she knows retina are not supposed to be _inflamed_. It's a bad sign, though both Kakashi and Obito appear asymptomatic. For now.

Fuck, but she needs friends who aren't ninja.

Rin heads straight home after Minato-sensei excuses himself with some vague mumbling about a meeting with Intelligence. She has a shift in the emergency room tomorrow and Kiana-sensei's not going to be the least bit concerned with Uchiha and/or squad drama. Not when Konoha's under a never ending onslaught from Iwa spies. And intra-village spats because something new is rationed every day. The spirits protect them if alcohol ever becomes a controlled substance.

Will she even have a squad after the shock of Kakashi's Sharingan blows over? Minato-sensei would let her know if she suddenly became a squad-less chuunin. Wouldn't he?

Rin's hardly an essential part of the team. She's good at her job, sure, but her team is up in the air because their skill levels are not balanced. Kakashi is self-sufficient, Obito's languishing in career chuunin mediocrity (or he was), and Minato-sensei won't be allowed to traipse around taking standard jounin-led squad missions much longer. It's honestly a miracle they haven't disbanded already.

As it turns out, Rin doesn't get to hear from her team in almost two weeks, and not because the village is exploding with news about Kakashi. Iwa realizes it won't last long with the Kannabi Bridge destroyed, so most of the spies still within Konoha start working up the courage to go out in a blaze of bloody, poisonous glory.

A spy posing as an Academy instructor (how the fuck did they manage to creep in that far?) deploys some kind of poison gas in the Academy lunch room. Rin spends that night trying to keep a bunch of kids adequately ventilated, though their red blood cells are dying. Three of them die, including a Hyuuga. She doesn't have time to mourn - or go home - because an explosion bolts through the entire village just before her shift ends.

Rin's not even sure where exactly it happened (North? Near the Tower?) but it doesn't much matter. Medics start pouring into the hospital, and the ones already there are not allowed to leave. A battle so intense it makes the ones that kicked off the war seem tame rages through Konoha.

Shinobi come and go, some injured and others passing through to make sure the hospital isn't compromised. They fail, of course. On the fourth night of the ordeal, long after Rin has stopped painting her cheeks, she almost loses her neck to a ninja with a broken arm. He goes for her jugular while she's trying to asses if his shoulder is dislocated, and Rin falls to the ground, landing on her outstretched arm like a clumsy child on her first day at the Academy. She wakes up, slides behind him and severs his kidney with Chakra Scalpel. He still fights back, so she grabs the back of his head and uses her chakra to slice his brain to mush.

She kicks the body when it hits the floor, then almost starts crying. Kiana-sensei yells for her before she has much time to get a hold of herself.

By the end of that night, Rin's eyes are pulsing, like they want to escape her head. Kiana-sensei orders her to the on-call room after she spends fifteen minutes trying to get an IV line on a dehydrated smack addict instead of leaving it to a volunteering genin. Rin's at the ED's door when she hears two other medics gossiping that Kakashi - _Kakashi!_ \- has a Sharingan. She's so tired it barely fazes her.

Except it does because she spends her entire, precious break lying awake on a bunk bed, trying to not to think about what must have happened to her squad.

Minato-sensei's probably in the hart of whatever's going on, either organizing ANBU or personally taking out the Iwa stragglers still snaking through Konoha.

It's Kakashi and Obito who are up in the air.

Rin's on in the middle of her fourth soldier pill high when Obito lands on one of the ED bunks with a deep gash from his inner thigh down to the back of his knee. She can tell right away that the cut missed all major blood vessels because most of the nastiness is coagulating already and Obito doesn't seem grossly hypovolemic, at least not just by cursory examination. She takes his vitals herself just to make sure anyway, fighting an urge to sit down and demand he tell her. . . everything.

"I'm fine," says Obito when she starts checking his pupils, "just gotta make sure it's not poisoned."

That's part of the reason she's checking his pupils. Iwa ninja have so many nasty liquids and gases that do _so many_ different things.

"How's Kakashi?" asks Rin, when she's halfway through cleaning his wound.

"Fuck if I know," says Obito, looking away from her.

Well, it's not like she's not worried about him too, but Kakashi's the one who might be dead in a ditch somewhere, for all they know.

The days blur together after that. Hours mending bones and sliced muscles in the ED followed by restless naps in the on-call room and soldier pills that make her hands shake. They run out of morphine at one point, which makes dealing with collateral (civilian) injuries next to impossible. One day, a doughy medic with a pimply nose reveals herself as a spy by trying to impale Rin with the blunt edge of scalpel.

Rin's sure the girl _meant_ to attack with the correct side but they're all _so_ tired. Kiana-sensei snaps the girls neck and sends Rin up to the on-call room without much fuss.

Finally, they get news that Minato-sensei has dragged the current Tsuchikage to Konoha and forced him to order his spies to _cut if the fuck off_. Probably not in those exact words, but Rin's head, neck, spine, calves, and legs hurt too much for her to quibble about technicalities. It still takes a while, obviously, but two days letter things have calmed down enough that Kiana-sensei orders Rin to head home and not show her face in the hospital for at least forty-eight hours.

Kakashi's the one who wakes her, and she's so happy to see him relatively well that she can't muster up enough indignation to yell at him for breaking through her traps and sneaking into her tiny apartment. Then watching her sleep like a creep for fuck knows how long.

"Your mask," starts Rin, then has to cough and wince. Her throat feels like it's been rubbed with sandpaper.

Kakashi shrugs, rubs his naked chin, then passes her a canteen. "Uchiha don't wear masks in our own home," he says mechanically, "we have nothing to hide."

Rin likes to think she can pick the different edges to his voice, when he's joking, when he's serious, and when he's sad. And when he's frozen in the fog of mission mode.

"They're treating you well?"

Kakashi shrugs. Uchiha blue looks good on him, makes him seem less ghostly pale.

"Why are you here?" asks Rin. To say goodbye? She'd have expected such a thing from Obito.

"Obito's in the hospital with. . . I don't know how many broken ribs," answers Kakashi. "I didn't know if anyone else would bother to tell you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What am I going to do with my life when I have to go back to preparing for board exams?


	5. Chapter 5

The Uchiha turn out to be a pretty diverse bunch, at least when they're not presenting a united front to the rest of the village. Kakashi's kind of surprised about it, though he really shouldn't be since he's been exposed to both Obito and Shisui long before the Sharingan disaster.

He can't make himself stop calling it that in his head.

There's Obito, who's somehow managing to suck worse now that he has Sharingan. There has to be something wrong with his limbs, no matter how much Rin insists he's normal. He can't follow even the most basic of _kata_ with any degree of competence, and certainly not at the level a sixteen year old chuunin should. Only when he's angry, or when there's an enemy coming for his throat, does he ever achieve any noticeable fluidity.

It's harder for the younger kids to hit him now, for what little that means.

Then there's Shisui, who might just approach Minato-sensei himself when it comes to speed and talent. He jokes, pretends he doesn't understand politics and strategy beyond "get behind the enemy and stick metal into any convenient vital spot", but Kakashi sees him scanning the room during Clan meetings, cutting in with a flighty comments when it looks like a fight's about to break out, wide nostrils flaring when someone higher in the family tree talks down to him. Or says something shitty about the village in general.

The majority of Uchiha are painfully ordinary, Sharingan excluded. They whine about incompatible teammates, idiot civilians, insufferable escort mission, Iwa, muscle strains, unexpected missing-nin. . . the shit most ninja complain about when given half a chance. The unmarried clansmen have a habit of studying the family tree to argue how far away from a technically distant female cousin they have to be in order to fuck them without risking a funny offspring.

"Genetically speaking, relationships between second cousins or closer are considered consanguineous," Kakashi tells a couple of boys one day, though they should probably know that better than him. "So a third cousin is about as related to you as a stranger, at least when it comes to blood."

The boys stare at him with wide eyes, then they're laughing like he's told the best joke since Jiraiya left the village. Younger Uchiha start including him in conversations after that day.

A tiny success after months into a mission.

Some clan members are outright _nice_ , which Kakashi still has trouble accepting sometimes. Old Teyaki and Uruchi keep giving him - and all other Uchiha (shit, he's already thinking of himself as one of them) - senbei when he gets back from missions. Kakashi wondered how they stayed in business until the day he saw an Uchiha jounin giving the couple a slip to collect payment for an S-rank mission on his behalf. The entire clan keeps the old couple going, partly because they like the senbei, but mostly because they have an uncanny ability to wring smiles out of even the most douchey of douchebags in the foulest of moods.

They're the first one who accept Kakashi despite his white hair and pale chakra.

Where the fuck the white _chakra_ came from if he's not Hatake Sakumo's son. . . well, the Uchiha elders are trying to figure it out, all dying to do hell knows what to poor bastard who decided his sperm was his own. The leading theory is that his mother had been the original Uchiha bastard, but she died in childbirth and had no family. The Elders keep asking Kakashi which Uchiha showed any interest in him prior to the Sharingan disaster, like they think his. . . _father_ , or grandfather maybe, has been skulking about, yearning for a connection with his bastard or something.

There's Obito, who probably couldn't talk a woman into fucking him now, much less when he was six or seven. Shisui also said spoke to him at Jounin Headquarters a couple of times. . . but he would've been about five when Kakashi was conceived. Kakashi can't think of anyone else besides random police officers he worked with since becoming a ninja. Though he tries not to, he looks among the older Uchiha clansmen sometimes, searching for his eyebrows, the shape of his nose, the curve of his lips, or the angle of his jaw.

Kakashi has spent hours in front of a mirror since the Sharigan disaster. Before, he'd have been hard pressed to describe his own face.

Anyway.

Five months after the Sharingan incident, Sandaime-sama announces he's retiring and the village elders name Minato-sensei Yondaime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit, it's my bedtime.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the whole point of this "exercise" was to just write _something_ every night without letting ~ideas~ turn it into a 10k dissertation. 
> 
> So here's for tonight.

Rin doesn't see much of Kakashi after Minato-sensei becomes Yondaime. It's to be expected. Rin spends most of her time in the hospital and Kakashi isn't injured often.

"I don't know why you keep asking me about him," Obito snaps one day as she mends another one of his bones. His left index finger this time, fractured during a run-in with Iwa stragglers who attacked a merchant he'd been guarding. But the merchants was safe, meaning Obito successfully completed his first solo mission. The Sharingan must be good for something. "He hasn't asked me about you _once_."

Rin has to be pathetic because the first thing that pops into her mind is relief that Kakashi's at least spending time with Obito.

Weeks later, Kiana-sensei asks her if she's planning to take the jounin exam anytime soon.

Rin hadn't thought about it, though she's done a couple of simple surgeries on her own (mostly out necessity, not out of because any of the jounin medics are overtly impressed with her progress) and none of the patients had died. She has a respectable amount of raw chakra at her disposal, and she's not so modest that she'd denied her control is unparalleled among her peers (barring Kakashi, who doesn't actually _have_ any peers). Her time in Minato-sensei's squad solidified her credentials as far as secrecy, composure, and stress management are concerned.

Still, Rin has never entertained the notion that she'd rise through the ranks, not even after becoming the token girl in Minato-sensei's near symbolic genin squad.

"You should do it," Obito advises the instant she's done explaining her misgivings about becoming a jounin. "No seriously; you're the best medic who's ever fixed me up, and I see you guys a lot! We need more people like you at the hospital."

Sure, but what about what Rin truly wants?

A chuunin makes enough to live on - not extravagantly so, but Rin doesn't have expensive tastes. At first she'd plan to be a ninja until she had the skills to be independent (she was not going to be like her mother; just another uneducated woman at some violent drunk's mercy). Becoming a medic at all had been a tough decision, since it's much harder for anyone in the medical corp to quit. Jounin medics - all jounin, actually - didn't retire. They died or became missing nin.

She doesn't want to say yes, but the pressure to do so comes from all sides. Konoha lost three veteran surgeons during the war, and about thirty five percent of all chuunin medics. Combat chuunin are down by forty-five percent, so most genin with the slightest promise are not-so-gently encouraged to specialize in whatever offensive jutsu they're best at. The hospital is understaffed, so quitting would be only slightly better than deserting the village altogether.

Not that Rin can quit. Just because the war's over doesn't mean she doesn't have to eat.

But the ED shifts are grueling, especially now that she averages about five a week. During the worst times (when junkies are spitting at her and children vomiting at her feet), Rin considers taking an escort mission just to add some variety to her misery.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back with an attempt to keep my "write something every week" resolution though I kind of blew last week already. 
> 
> Well, there were those few paragraphs of that other story I didn't post.

It's like being in a permanent infiltration mission. There's no place for Shisui - whoever that may be deep down inside - to breathe. At home he's the third son of a second son's third daughter (barely and Uchiha if not for all the chakra, speed, and. . . there's always the eyes), and his loyalty is never questioned, though his attitude certainly is.

To the rest of the village, he might as well be the next Uchiha Clan Head; powerful, but mostly in a way that makes everyone uneasy. It's not like he's a Hyuuga slave with a bomb on his forehead.

He likes ANBU well enough, at least when Danzo's too busy politicizing to bother him much. Something about that mask is more comforting than it should be.

The Clan hasn't made up its mind about Yondaime-sama yet, and Shisui's praying the man's smart enough to dance the thin line of charismatic newcomer who might just be sweet enough for manipulation and. . . everything else a Kage needs to be. Strong. Cunning. Ruthless. He's got nothing to do with the Senju, so if he sucks up just enough at the right times, the Uchiha Elders might finally shut the fuck up about injustices and rebellion.

The whole Kakashi thing's not helping matters in the slightest.

"It just makes us look bad," Shanoh whines one windy afternoon, after Kakashi's wiped the floor with six-man squad made of the best Uchiha chuunin.

Sparring only, but. . . 

"Him walking around like just anyone can get Sharingan, and there're no consequences."

"It's not like this is _his_ fault," Shisui interjects, though Shanoh's like five uncles ahead of him in the family tree, and he should probably just shut up and keep his head down.

"Who cares whose fault it is?" snaps Shanoh.

 _Anyone with logic?_ Shisui doesn't dare say. He will be of no use to anyone, Uchiha or otherwise, if he's ever anything more than a shadow.

"And with those rumors about Fugaku's brat. . ."

Shisui excuses himself before he loses his temper.

Outside of the cycle of pointless drama among the Uchiha and village higher ups, things are getting better. There's no longer any doubt the Secret War is over (as over as shinobi wars can ever be anyway), and Suna's too wrapped up in a drought to care much about what Konoha's getting up to. Even Kumo's mostly simmering with low grade baseline hostility. The village's rebuilding despite everything else.

Honestly, who even cares if the Uchiha heir's a little slow? Isn't he still baby anyway? Definitely under five. And even if he does turn out dumb, can't Mikoto just pop out another one? They're shinobi, not prissy nobles. Shouldn't the Clan Head be whoever's most qualified for the job?

At least the Hyuuga don't bother with a thin veneer of fairness towards each other.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is a timeline?

Obito might have dislocated his right shoulder one too many times. He's just pushing sixteen and there's a burning, numb ache that spreads all the down the side of his right arm. His fourth and pinkie finger both have a fine tremor that even Sharingan can't see at odd times during the day. Obito _feels_ it though, and it's doing nothing to help his already shitty aim.

Still, he's a good chuunin. Nothing that would make the Elders piss their pants in excitement, but he's completing all his missions with nothing more than a couple of minor injuries here and there. His public files aren't glowing with praise, but no one has much to complain about either. Seems like he's a career chuunin after all.

It's almost depressing how easy it is to accept now that there's something about Kakashi he can pity.

"You're joining ANBU, then?" Obito asks one sunny afternoon he happened to run into Kakashi while waiting in line at Uchiha Senbei.

". . . That's supposed to be classified," mumbles Kakashi. Without that stupid mask, he can't hide the baby fat still adorning his cheeks and chin. He's a cute kid, but undoubtedly still a _kid_. Does Rin still want him even though it's pretty obvious that puberty's taking its time with him?

"It's a political power play." Obito shrugs. The Uchiha are mostly average people, Sharingan or not. He should know better than anyone, what with being only _slightly_ less useless since awakening his.

Point is, any Uchiha with even a lick of talent _has_ to make waves in the village proper.

Much to Obito's shock, Kakashi accepts his invitation to eat together after they get their senbei. They end up on a fat tree branch that offers excellent shade and cover after Kakashi makes a derisive comment about making invitations without having plans, as though Obito hadn't said the words out sheer left over habit from their team days. Not that Kakashi had ever said yes to his invitations then, which Obito hadn't minded since it'd given him unlimited time to pine pathetically for Rin. Besides, Kakashi's a prepubescent punk, not some girl Obito's trying to sweet talk.

"You be careful in ANBU, alright?" says Obito after the senbei's done and they're just lounging on the branch, enjoying warm gusts of wind and bird songs.

"I'm always careful," says Kakashi. "You're the one who wouldn't know stealth if it sneaked into your bathroom and used your toothbrush."

"That's too tame for ANBU trash talk," says Obito. "Say shit like. . . you wouldn't know stealth if it kidnapped your Mom and sneaked her into your room to fuck her. Or something like that."

"You're gross."

"Just saying," continues Obito, "work on those entry-level taunts before you're in with ANBU if you wanna fit in."

"It's an elite military force, not a civilian secondary school," protests Kakashi.

 _Not according to Shisui,_ Obito doesn't say.

Kakashi would ask for details and there's no guarantee the dumbass wouldn't start his tenure at ANBU by announcing his cousin Shisui hates almost every single member of his squad. And dislikes practically every ANBU member he comes across.

"Rin's going to be a surgeon," says Obito to fill the silence.

"I know," says Kakashi. "We see each other once a week."

Well. Who would've guessed. . . Obito hasn't broken anything in a while and the last time he did, Rin wasn't in the ED.

Maybe being around all those pheromones will finally make Kakashi's balls drop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No seriously. I have no idea how old these kids are. Or how long between the Obito's "death" and Naruto being born. Idk. Idk.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am proud of myself for doing so many of these with only the vaguest hints of plot thrown in for shits and giggles.

"So. . . that was anticlimactic." Lion, ANBU captain since the Second Secret War (or so he introduced himself to Kakashi), is standing over the body of a Konoha missing-nin (who are apparently much more common than Kakashi ever imagined). Lion seems like a blowhard, slower than Shisui and definitely not as smart as the Hyuuga in their team.

At least their target went down easy. One kunai to the back of the neck, between the second and third vertebra. Not a single clone, Shadow or anything fancier.

"You sure there's no one else around, Eagle?" asks Lion.

"Just as sure as I was when you asked thirty seconds ago," says the one Kakashi's still calling the Hyuuga. The animal names thing is never going to be not stupid.

"Blow me, it was _at least_ a minute ago," says Lion.

"Suicide by ANBU?" suggests Shisui. Weasel.

Kakashi wonders who picks their codenames. He doesn't have one yet.

"Great, awesome," mumbles Lion. "He couldn't just tack a Exploding Tag on his chest like any self-respecting suicidal motherfucker. He just _had_ to waste our time."

"That mental health awareness seminar they made you do last year was a roaring success, wasn't it?" says Eagle.

"Oh, I'm sorry," says Lion, "do we need to take a moment to talk about your feelings?"

"Let's just wrap this up," says Shisui, not bothering to hold back a sigh.

As the youngest member of the team - still on a trial run, really, which is unlikely to be finished since the mission turned out to be so simple - Kakashi's the one stuck disposing of the body. The nights are getting colder and ANBU don't wear long sleeves for some reason no one bothered to explain to him. He has to use chakra to keep himself warm, chakra which he prefers to save for battle.

Kakashi's no medic, but does take a moment to inspect the missing-nin's body for occult injuries (maybe head trauma's the reason he didn't put up a fight, or stiff joints prevented him from trying to run away). He tries to put all the guy's joints through the usual ranges of motion, even activates his much despised Sharingan, which does nothing because it's not like the target's moving on his own anymore.

He was blond, with high cheekbones and way too prominent clavicles. Not many blonds in Konoha. In fact, Kakashi can't think of anyone besides Yondaime-sama and the Yamanaka.

Finally, he takes some of the poor bastard's blood in case Rin can get any info out of it. Though he might not be allowed to take any evidence from ANBU Headquarters.

"We don't always get uneventful ones," Shisui tells Kakashi next morning as they head back to the Uchiha compound.

Kakashi will have to go on another mission before his recruitment into ANBU is finalized. Lion refused to sign off on him, though he at least made sure to clarify that it wasn't because of anything Kakashi himself did or didn't do.

"Did they tell you anything about our target?" asks Kakashi. He can't forget how the guy's clavicles felt under his thumb while he checked for obvious fractures.

"ANBU black marks aren't biographies," Shusui shakes his head. "We're lucky to get a name and a general description with shitty speculation about where the target's expected to be."

Odd. Kakashi used to get fairly detailed reports from Yondaime-sama during his genin squad days. Why would ANBU have to function with less intel than genin?

"But I knew him," Shisui adds unprompted. "He was a good guy."

Kakashi's not sure what to make of that. Missing-nin are trash, the basest of traitors. They're about as good as the grime that grows in the sink if you go too long without doing dishes.

But the target wasn't an Uchiha (a stray thought about there being no blond Uchiha is chased away by a reminder of his own hair color), so Kakashi can't really say Shisui's comment was putting the Uchiha over the village.


	10. Chapter 10

"I want to have a baby," Kushina tells Minato the next time he announces he got a measly eight hours to himself barring any catastrophe putting all of Konoha in danger.

Minato sputters and Kushina tries not too take it personally when he shrinks back from her like a genin running away from a medic armed with a vaccine. She's straddling his lap so she can tell real easily the part of him she needs is on board.

"With _me?_ " Minato bleats.

"Well, it's not like I got a harem of husbands to pick from," says Kushina.

"I mean - please, can just sit up straight . . ."

Kushina narrows her eyes and so he leans on his arms.

"We can talk like this too," continues Minato. "I just . . . I never thought about having kids, not since I worked out your . . . tenant situation. The risk . . ."

Minato's supposed to be the best diplomat in Konoha but he's always turned into a mumbling dumbass around Kushina. Marriage did little to make him less shy around her, which under most circumstances Kushina finds charming. Flattening even. Not many women - not _any_ woman besides her - can boast being able to reduce the infamous Yondaime Hokage incapable of finishing a sentence.

"Let me worry about my tenant."

"But . . ." Minato trails off and Kushina wiggles on top of him, mostly because she can feel the parts of him most relevant to her at the moment beginning to lose interest. "I have an entire village to run . . ."

"I understand," says Kushina, rolling off him and settling on her belly next to him on the futon. "It's not like I can force you to become a father."

"You know . . ." Minato starts, then puts his arm around her waist and tries to spoon her. "Maybe someday - "

"It's going to be tough at first," interrupts Kushina, "You carved yourself a spot in my chest and you know it's been encased in rage for a long time . . ."

"What do you mean?"

"I'll just need to find a man willing to have a child with me," says Kushina, like she's explaining what water is to particularly dim child.

Minato freezes and Kushina would almost feel bad about blackmailing him but . . . well, she _does_ want a child, has probably been wanting one since little Itachi fell asleep on her bosom after crying himself to exhaustion that one time Mikoto asked her to watch him for a couple of hours.

She's practically surrender her husband to Konoha, only gets him for a handful of stolen hours a week. If Minato's not willing to be her family full time, the least he could do is help her get one.


	11. Chapter 11

The next time they try Kakashi out on a mission, the kid summons a little dog (more like one of those ugly poodles rich old ladies have in their bags, really) to sniff out a nasty illusionist who can mask his chakra so well even one of those Sensory types was having trouble weeding out her location. Their captain's delighted, and not just because the mission's completed way sooner than they anticipated. It's not every day someone gets such a perfect code name.

So Kakashi comes home with a Hound mask, or a mask with some markings that are supposed to represent a Hound, but shinobi aren't exactly artistically inclined. Shisui's own mask doesn't look anything like a weasel.

They glance at each other when they make it to the compound, then Kakashi makes some kind of grunting sound and goes off to the little one bedroom closet-apartment cousin Sheshe rents out to any low tier shinobi who've married into the clan. The kid does _not_ have the social skills of a low born clan brat, and it's going to bite him in the ass once the shock of his very existence wears off. If it hasn't already.

At least he's got the Elders less fired up about "boldly seizing their rightful place in the village" and similar nonsense. They need to find who exactly boldly put his dick in Kakashi's mother so he can be properly punished. Though there has been a lot of noise that everyone who's in the ninja ranks properly needs to be extra perfect to protect the clan's image, etc.

Shisui's quite frankly sick of it all. It's pretty hard to worry about image when you're ass deep in enemy territory, trying not to spark another war.

He's considering stopping by his mother's for some dinner before crashing at his apartment when he stumbles into a little wisp of a brat sitting under a tree, apparently transfixed by a stick.

Shisui almost keeps on walking, but the sun's about to set and he's not the kind of dick to leave a baby out alone at night. He approaches the kid and is shocked when the little boy's big eyes are on him before he's had a chance to open his mouth. The boy - or maybe girl? - has good instincts. Shisui crouches down and plasters a big smile on his face.

"Hi," he starts, then waits for the kid to _very carefully_ set his stick down. "I'm Shisui. Who're you?"

The kid's head tilts. "Itachi."

Shisui's smile doesn't falter, but then he remembers the heir's supposed to be weird anyway so he lets his head drop and grunts. "Where's your security detail?"

"My what?"

If Shisui remembers correctly. . . "Cousin Kata and Cousin Rui."

"Oh," says Itachi, turning his attention back on the stick. "They were making a baby so I came to help my friends."

"Amazing," says Shisui.

He's a virgin and sex's still ruining his life. First, there's the entire Kakashi fiasco and now. . . Now the venerable Kata - barely passable jounin, but son to the man most determined to usurp Fugaku and stir shit with the village - loses sight of the Clan's moon brained presumptive air because he's fucking a chuunin Uchiha-in-name-only.

He sighs, considers if it would be best to hide and wait for someone _else_ to find and deliver Itachi to his parents -

\- but then realizes what exactly life's handing him.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh . . . I'm back?

Yondaime's life is complicated. Any Hokage's life if complicated, though Minato's pretty confident none of his predecessors had to worry about the possible destruction of the village just because his wife was mere weeks from giving birth. Maybe if he didn't have that hanging over his head, it wouldn't have taken Minato three days to notice that the Uchiha were quietly imploding.

"What?" is all he can say when Fugaku reluctantly informs him that 'Itachi is missing'.

"We are searching for him," says Fugaku, in the mechanic tone of someone groomed to be more of a political pawn than a man. "Itachi has always been clumsy. We fear he's. . . injured himself and gotten lost in the compound."

The low grade headache Minato's been living with for at least a month intensifies. His ever-present ANBU entourage is shifting in the shadows and crannies surrounding the area, like a war's about to break out. The clansman flanking Fugaku, their eyes cold and red, certainly aren't helping things. Most embarrassing of all, Minato doesn't know when he would've gotten wind of this if it hadn't occurred to him that Kushina's mood might be lightened if he brought odd little Itachi home for a couple of hours.

"Alright," says Minato, not bothering to keep himself from rubbing his temples in exasperation. "I'm gonna look for him." He shot Fugaku a glare. "I should've been told about this the moment it happened. Don't think I'll forget that."

He summons one of the medics holed up in Intelligence. The woman isn't the least bit fazed by his questions of a five-year-old boy's fertility, which is something Minato will try very hard not to think too much about.

"Barring any strange hormonal disturbances," she says as though discussing the weather, "five-year-old boys do not make viable sperm, but it would be possible to induce spermarche with pulsatile hormonal treatment. Extraction of the viable sperm - "

"That's fine," interrupts Minato. "Those are not the details I need. How long would this pulsatile hormone treatment take?"

"It's not done often enough to be a precise science - "

 _How wonderful,_ Minato thinks

" - but it's a delicate process. It'd take, at minimum, three months."

Minato nods. "Thank you for your loyal service."

The woman bows and flickers away.

"I'm gonna know that until I die," Minato tells the ANBU standing behind him. "Don't follow me."

He flickers to the Monument, spares a smile for to the workers trying to carve his mug into the mountainside, then scans the village. He's fumbled, yes, but he's got foreign spy activity in the village mapped as accurately as the contours of his own face. If anyone's kidnapped Itachi, it was Root. Maybe the Hyuuga. They'd be in the outskirts of the village. Maybe the village itself.

Minato takes a deep breath, then joins the village's very air. Civilians feel a quick, hot breeze. Shinobi learn that Hokage-sama's looking for something, probably something that pissed him off. Kushina's going to have questions, and Minato intends to have answers for her.

He finds Itachi huddled by a pond a handful of miles south of the Uchiha compound. Alone. Except for a pair of strange crows hovering about him like he's their chick. Minato stands behind the boy, staring at his narrow shoulders for a full minute before walking forward.

"Hey," he starts, glaring at the crows. Something's off about the entire situation. The Uchiha should've found the brat by now.

The boy takes his sweet time to look up at Minato. Then he pouts and goes back to caressing the pond's clear surface. The ripples he makes are beautifully even.

"Your family's really worried about you," says Minato.

"No, they're not," argues Itachi. "They have the new baby."

For fuck's sake. If Minato almost had an aneurysm because a clan brat got jealous. . . "Let me take you back home."

"No. Home's here now, with my friends." One of the crows hops onto Itachi's head.

Minato didn't have time for this. He's about to grab the brat, kill the weird crows if necessary, and dump him back with his incompetent family when he finally notices what Itachi's trying to do. The boy's trying to weave thin tendrils of chakra into the pond's surface.

"Like this," says Minato, laying a hand over the pond, then siphoning just enough water to grab Itachi's attention.

The boy beams, then reaches for Minato's arm. Minato lifts the orb out of his reach, then shakes his head. "I'll see to it that someone teaches you how to do this," he says, "but you have to come back home."

Itachi glares, and the crows. . . make a noise that sounds annoyed. Then Itachi nods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, how's everyone been?


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back with another short piece.

"It's not like the jounin exam for medics tests are anything you're used to," Rin tells Kakashi when he offers to help her prepare. "People won't care about how much of a badass I can be if I don't know my anatomy and toxicology."

"Alright," says Kakashi.

"How have you been anyway?"

Kakashi showed up -- out of the blue, as he usually did -- to walk her home from the hospital. She prefers to see him at night, when his pale face is a bit more difficult to see. She'd never thought there would be a circumstance when seeing Kakashi without a mask would unnerve her, but life just loves to prove her wrong. Now, it was just a reminded that he was an Uchiha.

"Fine, I guess," says Kakashi. "ANBU's more boring than you'd think most days. It's Obito's life that's getting hellish."

Yes, escort missions were turning out to be an extension of the Secret War. Or so Rin hears from most active chuunin taking the brunt of post-war missions. She likes to think that working more or less on his own would help Obito mature, because what else is she supposed to do?

"And it's not like joining the police force would be any better," continues Kakashi.

"It would be," says Rin. She's been trying to talk Obito into doing as much for weeks, and it'd be easier if she had Kakashi on her side.

"How's being dropped in the middle of intra-village politics any better than anything going on in Rain?" asks Kakashi. "Especially now that the police force is asking for better pay?"

"I don't know, but I get less injured policemen than chuunin in the ER."

"That's because the injured policemen go to Uchiha medics," says Kakashi. "I don't know who the hell sold the Uchiha on this police crap, but we have them to thank for all this shit."

"Like it's so terrible." As far as Rin could see, the Uchiha were the only clansmen with guaranteed work in the village bankrolled by shinobi activity. What was a Yamanaka that couldn't be a ninja, for example?

"It's a pretty shit deal if you only think about it," says Kakashi. "Everyone hates cops and every villager now gets to target their hate at one specific family. Everyone thinks the Hyuuga are creepy, sure, but when was the last time a Hyuuga busted your obnoxious birthday party? And the pay may sound good on the surface, but if you look deeper, you realize that having to maintain an active police force keeps Uchiha jounin from completing high volumes of A and S-ranked missions. Means less money and less recognition, which results in less political clout in the village."

"Oh yes, poor Uchiha," says Rin, exasperated even though she can't deny the logic of Kakashi's argument.

"Hardly," says Kakashi. "They could resolve the problem if they just got their heads out their ass and refused to handle the police force. It'd force the rest of the clans to pick up the slack, especially the Hyuuga, and it'd free up Uchiha for the regular corps."

"Should you even be saying that out loud?" Whatever Kakashi's deal was in the Uchiha compound, she's sure it involves sucking up.

"There's no one around to hear." Kakashi scoffs. "The Uchiha have to accept that they don't have the manpower needed to crank out shinobi worth a damn _and_ run a police force. Not without forcing the lower clansmen and women to breed the same way the Hyuuga do. Maybe not even with demanding more babies from the clanswomen."

"Fuck." Clan politics are just disgusting. "Kakashi, what are you going to do when they ask you to marry someone?" He's had a growth spurt and his voice is deeper.

"I don't know," says Kakashi. "The Uchiha don't force marriage at least; they just get pushy. I suppose I'll have to pretend I can't get it up for women or something."

"There are drugs for that, you know."

Kakashi actually laughs at that, a short chuckle she only hears because she always pays close attention to him. Things couldn't be that bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BTW, for the last few months, I've been keeping a blog:
> 
> http://dynamicallyopposed.blogspot.com/
> 
> I don't post anything about fanfic there (that's what this site is for!). But I have been writing original fiction, including a novel. Self-publishing is making getting stuff out to the world so convenient that I thought I'd give it a shot.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting back into fanfic again, and this story has been designated as my ramble place. I didn't even proofread this, just be warned.
> 
> Warning at end-notes this time

Obito's read enough shitty pamphlets about depression and suicide to recognize he's in trouble long before he gets gutted in the stomach by a Rain chuunin and thinks _well, maybe it'll be easier if I cut my neck open before this gets infected_.

The wound turns out to be more painful than serious. By some miracle, the Rain bastard missed all vital organs, and the medic on the team happened to have enough antibiotics on her. She's nowhere as good at healing as Rin, and she rambles something about the risks of abscesses before sealing the wound--which, by the way, hurt way more than Obito expected--but Obito's back on his feet two days later, not once having suffered a fever. And he thinks _what a damn waste_

There are, theoretically, resources he can. . . utilize or whatever. The head medics set up some buddy system for sad veterans (which is almost everyone in Konoha by now). He can tell his chuunin captain he's thinking that maybe, being dead would be such a bad thing and instantly get benched for a few weeks. With hounding to come back sooner, so it'd be more like a couple of days, but it'd be something.

It all sounds like too much hassle. Besides, Obito's not crumbling or anything. He's doing his job fine. Mediocre as always, but it's not like his moping is putting him or his teams in any extra danger. He's sleeping fine, more than fine maybe. He's even keeping up with his training, for all the good it's doing him. Obito doesn't even want to actively kill himself; he just thinks it wouldn't be too bad if he _were_ to die.

Who would miss him, first of all?

Kakashi's been spending more time off in ANBU business and when he's back in the compound, a throng of Uchiha trainees trail him like duckies, asking for pointers about stance and jutsu and--in the name of all that's logical and sacred--genetics and marriage. Obito's pretty sure he had a nightmare or two about that in the past, but never was his subconscious perverse enough to give Kakashi a Sharingan.

Rin's too busy with her surgeon and jounin stuff to remember he exists most of the time. When he visits her out of pathetic, hopeful habit, all she can talk about is Kakashi.

Yondaime is Yondaime.

He's pretty sure he could explode in the middle of the compound, showering his family with blood and guts, and they'd somehow manage not to notice him.

The sad, cold reality is that no one would've mourned Obito if that Rain ninja had killed him. Rin and Kakashi might've spared some token sadness for a few days, but deep down they'd have been relieved to be rid of him, the snail that clung to the tattered remains of their pseudo-team.

Kakashi finds him huddled between two branches of the oldest tree in the Uchiha compound. Obito can't even muster token annoyance at being sneaked up on so easily. He just hums a tired greeting at the air in front of Kakashi.

"You need to stop bothering Rin about every scrape you get," says Kakashi. "I'm tired of hearing her babble about your safety every time I see her."

Obito smiles--grins, actually; a fat grin that engages every muscle in his face. He's pathetically grateful that Kakashi and Rin don't just forget he exists when he's not around them.

"What's that stupid smile about?"

Obito doesn't bother to rein himself in. It's been so long since he grinned that he feels like he's stretching his face muscles. It feels good. He laughs.

"Are you high?" demands Kakashi.

"High on life, baby cousin," says Obito, getting up and throwing an arm around Kakashi's slim shoulders. "The head family's doing one of those morale boosting-slash-posturing dinners tonight. Let's go ogle at rich cousins who wouldn't spit on us if we were on fire."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, and I figured out how to link to [my blog](http://dynamicallyopposed.blogspot.com/). I will now be adding that everywhere, like a kid with a new toy.
> 
> Warning: thoughts of suicide and depression


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been getting an itch to write for this fandom again. My ADHD doesn't let me focus on anything.

The kid is brilliant. Shisui doesn't know the first thing about babies, but he can tell that much. He's wondering why no one else sees it.

"Anyone teaching you jutsu, yet?" he asks the boy one day.

"Teaching?"

"You know," says Shishui, "when someone shows you how to do something?"

"Like the crows?"

"I don't think so," says Shisui. "Like when your mom shows you how to do something."

"I've seen Mother with the shuriken," says Itachi. "She forgot one once. And there's a lady that comes to talk to me about water because the blond guy who found me before sends her. She's nice, but she doesn't know a lot about water."

He's heard of the promise Hokage-sama made to Itachi, but he's never paid attention it. A baby who so much as _attempted_ Nature Transformation? Absurd. "Do you know where the shuriken is?" 

But Shisui already knows the answer to that. He isn't surprised when the kid leads him to a clearing less than half-a-mile away from the Fugaku's veranda, where he's got a dying tree with a hallowed out trunk filled with odd trinkets, a blanket, bones that Shisui tries to ignore, and a single shuriken.

"What are those bones?" Shisui asks as he runs the pad of his index finger over the shuriken's edge. It's a high quality weapon, but it has dulled, especially at the tips.

"The crows bring them," says Itachi. "And they take the old ones away."

The twisted paperclips and shining rocks do look like the kinds of things crows like to mess with. "Have you been playing with this?" he asks Itachi, gesturing with the shuriken.

The boy nods.

"Show me."

Itachi's reach is what Shisui would have expected. Well, he didn't have much to expect of a small kid, but it's not so wide that Shisui is impressed. What almost floors him is how _accurate_ the brat is, and he almost didn't think to test that. Only a whim prompted Shisui to mark a spot on a the trunk and ask Itachi to hit it. Then he asks the kid to do it again, again, and again. Itachi doesn't miss once.

Shisui starts moving the target, first a little father, which doesn't work. Then he just things to put the target between twigs, behind branches, or between the crows' trinkets. Itachi hits the target every single time.

Shisui praises him, which doesn't affect Itachi in any way he can see. That's not normal. Shisui knows enough psychology to expect a child to be beside himself at an adult's approval, but Itachi just stares up at him with big dark eyes as if asking "So?" Withholding praise doesn't seem to phase him either. Shisui wonders if he even notices.

The kid finally stumbles when Shisui asks him to hit a moving target. A distressed frown appears over his young forehead. The pout he shoots Shisui would be adorable if. . . hell, it is adorable, circumstances be damned.

"Do you want to learn?" asks Shisui.

"I know how," protests the boy. "I just can't make it work."

"That's the same as not knowing."

The brat's glare intensifies.

"This is where you say 'please, Cousin Shisui, can you show me how?'"

It's comical how the boy's internal conflict plays over his face, or it would be, except. . . a clan brat shouldn't be wearing his emotions like that. Fugaku's written him off, as much as presumptive heir can be written off.

"Please, Cousin Shisui," Itachi says after his face has smoothed out, "can you show me how?"

So Shisui does, both expecting and not expecting that the kid will pick up the trick. He explains the struggle of trying to predict where a moving target will be, and aiming at that precise spot with the appropriate force. Cool, insistent wind interrupts their practice, which Shisui suspects is just a game to Itachi. He takes the opportunity to talk about wind resistance, and how difficult it is to hit a target in the middle of a storm.

"I know," says Itachi. "The crows don't like to fly in storms."

Those damned birds are never far away from Itachi. A pair that may or may not be the same every day (Shisui suspects that they are) flies around the kid, rarely making noise beyond the unassuming flapping of their wings. If Itachi didn't talk about them as if they were people, Shisui would have dismissed them as part of the background, no more important than a stray squirrel.

"Where did you meet your friends?" ask Shisui.

"They're always with me," says Itachi.

Shisui decides not to press the issue. The damned things are odd, but they've never been threatening, and he already examined them with his Sharingan to make sure they weren't actually the best, most patient spies in the world. Not that anyone should have any interest in stalking Fugaku's slow heir.

Though Shisui questioned that supposed "slowness". He knows the kid had not spoken a word until he was almost four, but then he'd started talking one day as if he'd been doing it all his life. _What_  he said rarely made coherent sense, but how many little kids made sense in the first place? And his pronunciation is pristine. It's discordant to hear such perfect enunciation from someone who doesn't reach Shisui's hip.

"Hey," Shisui starts as he's on his way to drop Itachi with his mother. The sun is almost beyond the horizon. Every once in a while, Shisui realizes he's lost track of the birds. "How did you figure out how to talk?"

"I always knew," says Itachi.

That doesn't make sense, obviously. Shisui accepts it anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My blog is [here](http://www.dynamicallyopposed.com/).
> 
> My biggest weakness (biggest, not only) is finishing a goddamned story. I will outline my next one though. It's about Mikoto.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where I come to mess around when I want to write, but have no idea what to write.

ANBU has a love-hate relationship with the Uchiha. Mostly hate. All joking aside, there are at least three captains that Kakashi is nervous about going on missions with. Ox, Rabbit, and Hippo. They got a grudge against the Uchiha that could level the village, and they're not too fond of his late father either.

"Just fucking ignore them," says Shisui at the mess hall in ANBU headquarters. The bastards are sitting a table away, talking about the police force's shittiness none-too-subtly. Around them, the din of casual chatter has taken a distinct artificial edge. Someone's waiting, or hoping, for a fight to break out.

"Simple enough to that here," says Kakashi. Especially for him. It's not like he has any knee-jerk reflexes to jump to the Uchiha's defense. Nice as most of them are, he's managed not to sink that deeply into his role. Thank the spirits for small favors.

"Don't feel pressured to take missions with those assholes," says Shisui, perhaps picking up on the things that Kakashi is smart enough not to say out loud.

"You take missions with them," points out Kakashi.

"Yeah, well." Shisui shrugs. "No one ever called _me_ smart.

That's obviously false; Uchiha Shisui is one of the most gifted ninja in the village. Kakashi doesn't question him though. He senses that Shisui is opening up and doesn't want to raise the guy's defenses once more.

And Minato-sama worried that he'd be too "anti-social" for this mission. The thought leaves Kakashi with a sour taste in his mouth.

With every passing mission, Kakashi grows more amazed at how cordial Konoha is. At any given moment, there are dozens of enemy shinobi masquerading as travelling merchants and potential clients. ANBU works insane hours to keep all skirmishes out of the village proper just to make sure that the civilians go about their lives thinking that the wars have paused, if not finished altogether. Kakashi would assume they were all in on the act, but he hadn't realized just how precarious their situation is until joining ANBU.

The chuunin, at least, glean the reality of their situation.

"Maybe we should just close our borders a bit," Obito mumbles from a hospital bed a few weeks later. He came back from his last mission with an impressive number of broken ribs (six). _Flail chest_ , Rin had said. "Let the civilians stew a little, or we'll have to start taking in missing-nin to pad our ranks."

"We're not quite _that_ fucked yet," says Kakashi.

"At least my Sharingan. . . or some shit," says Obito. "Elders say it was the fight, but just between you me, it was Rin fixing my ribs. She's mad; I think she went after my nerves of purpose."

"What?

"It's not my first fracture, and it never hurt like that before," says Obito.

"No." Kakashi shakes his head, annoyed. "I mean about your Sharingan."

"You know, my eyes got stronger," says Obito, waving a hand. "Make yourself useful and scratch my right big toe. Rin says not bend too much until tomorrow."

That's how Kakashi learns of the _tomoe_ , and how the Sharingan's power grows among a few select, lucky Uchiha.

"They don't trust you," Obito says when he notices that Kakashi is baffled. Then he shrugs, looking at him with an oddly apologetic air. "Can you really blame them, though?"

No. Kakashi can't. Still, it's a slap in the face that his new beloved family didn't bother to tell him that his vision might be in danger. He's been using Sharingan without a care in the world since this circus started.

"How do I know if I'm going blind?" he asks Shisui the next time they get a few moments of relative privacy.

Which means that Kakashi has to interrupt an A-rank mission miles from the village to handle personal bullshit. If the missing-nin catches them with their metaphorical pants down because of this, Kakashi's gonna hunt down the Uchiha elders one by one and choke them on their own airs of superiority.

"Eh. . ." Shisui frowns. "Cousin Obito's gonna get shit for this."

"He gets shit for everything," says Kakashi. "If it bothers you, you could keep this between us."

Shisui rubs his nose, then grunts. "That blindness thing. . . it may or may not have happened with Madara and his brother. You have to kill the person most important to you, or your brother, maybe? Most of us think it's probably bullshit."

"Probably?"

"Hey, we have magic eyeballs," says Shisui. "Weirder shit obviously happens."

Considering Kakashi's hilarious situation, truer words have never been spoken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [My blog](http://www.dynamicallyopposed.com/), currently about my job struggles. By Monday, I should know where I'll be for the next four years, barring a bus running me over. Pray for me.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back here, where I come to write without direction.

There's no reason for Obito to get within spitting distance of the Head Family. He's a career chuunin, a loser who's wasting a Sharingan that's actually trying to get stronger. The Elders bothered to let him copy a handful of high-level ninjutsu, and it turns out he's shit at coordinating them in an actual fight. Obito's actually impressed with himself for being a _ninja_ with a _Sharingan_ (evolved) that manages to be _clumsy_.

His family doesn't see what's so impressive, so he's never invited to any fancy parties at the Head Family's. He hears that Fugaku's brat is turning five, and isn't the least bit surprised that he's not invited to the birthday bash.

"I have a plus one," says Kakashi.

"Please," says Obito. "I'll never forgive myself if I cockblock you at this once-in-a-lifetime event." The new rumor is that little Itachi is not so slow after all, so Fugaku is going all out. Too bad—or perhaps too good—for the other brat that's on the way.

"I don't have plans to invite anyone else," says Kakashi.

"Not even Rin?" Obito would advise him to set his sights on a dude, if he can stomach it, but he doubts that the Elders have plans to marry Kakashi to any specific girl. He could ask for permission to marry Rin. At least.

"She'd get the wrong idea," says Kakashi, shaking his head.

"Not biting, eh?" And Obito had assumed Kakashi's balls had finally dropped.

"She deserves less baggage than me," says Kakashi. "Some nice civilian, hopefully."

Maybe it would be best, but Obito suspects that Rin has a thing for danger. Like most women.

Nevertheless, he ends up being Kakashi's plus one. He's invisible at the party, which suits him just fine because he gets to pig out on the booze and free food while his more important cousins stand around sucking up to each other while pretending to be above it all. Kakashi's trapped among them, throwing barbs that Obito refuses to believe are so subtle he's the only one who gets them.

Lady Mikoto announces that she's pregnant again after dinner, putting to rest all catty rumors that she's getting fat in her old age. Apparently thirty-something women are old, and not just if they happen to be jounin.

Eventually, Obito wonders where the birthday boy might be. There are no other children in the vicinity since the entire thing has nothing to do with the five-year-old they're supposedly celebrating, and that has to suck for the kid. Obito's parents had thrown him a real party. It's one of his few good memories. Then they'd died, but ninja village and ninja clan, etc. Obito knows he could have it worse.

He decides he's had enough when he catches one of his older cousins, a gorgeous chuunin with eyes as black as coffee and boobs bigger than her face, flirting with Kakashi. Unwilling to examine why it irks him so much (it's not like he blames the girl for social and power climbing), Obito escapes to the back of the house. It's moments like these that he wishes he could stand the smell of smoke. A nicotine fix would probably calm him down.

Cool wind caresses his face when he reaches the patio. A full moon with glowing in the dark sky, pretty enough that it manages to smooth out his nerves. Every time he thinks he's done being a jealous of Kakashi . . .

_Caw!_

Obito jumps, heart thumping like a race horse. He laughs when he sees a crow's wings flapping under the moonlight, wondering what Kakashi would say if he knew a bird can still startle Obito.

_Caw! Caw!_

It's stupid, but Obito swears the thing is trying to tell him something. He looks around, activating Sharingan out of habit, not expecting to see much of anything.

He almost misses the tall, hooded figure hunching over a boy dressed in a white kimono

". . . Hey!" he yells, legs rushing towards the scene.

The figure rises. Though he cannot see a face under the black hood, Obito knows its gaze is own him. His joints lock in place, freezing him like a mannequin. The figure walks forward. Obito's muscles don't respond to his commands.

It's genjutsu. Somehow, Obito's falling for a genjutsu. Under the film of terror gripping him, he's overcome with self-loathing. What kind of Sharingan does he _have_?

"Interesting," says a voice that scratches the eardrum like sandpaper. "Your head's just not wired right."

_Caw!_

The figure seems to turn towards the crow, buying Obito a painful moment of hope that's dashed when it shrugs, then turns its attention back on Obito.

"A spare is always a good idea," it says, laying its hand on Obito's head.

Obito thinks he screams. In his head, he screams and screams and _screams_ until his throat is raw, until he's out of air. And then some.

_Caw._

Obito startles awake, his breath punching out of his chest. He reaches for his head, sucking in air to scream once more, then realizes that there's no pain.

"Mister," says a childish voice.

Obito locks eyes with the kid—the infamous Itachi, probably—and lets out a short laugh. "I had too much to drink," he says. Except he's pretty sure he pigged out on food more than anything else. He has no desire to make a fool of himself in front of his whole family.

"Alright," says Itachi. "Can we go back in?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [My blog](http://www.dynamicallyopposed.com/), as per usual.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I showed this one to [luvsanime02](http://archiveofourown.org/users/luvsanime02/pseuds/luvsanime02) before posting, so it's way better than my previous unbeta'ed bits of this.

There’s a new baby at home. Everyone’s forgotten all about Itachi again.

Mother stays in bed for three whole days after the baby appeared, and still they bring the bundle to her every time it cries. Itachi wants to be with Mother too, but she only ruffles his head and asks Father, or one of his cousins, to take him away.

It’s not fair. He almost never bothers Mother. Only when he needs to show her what else the crows have brought him. 

“It’s a good thing he’s starting the Academy soon,” he hears her say one night, as he tries to visit her right after the baby is done crying. “I’m tired of sending him away all the time, but he always demands too much attention.”

Itachi goes back to his room. He does not cry because he’s not like that stupid baby, but he is mad because Mother is wrong. He _does not_ demand too much attention. If anything, she was the one who wouldn’t leave him alone before.

But now, she has _another_ new baby. And this one lives in his house, unlike the other one that Mother had to visit constantly.

He waits and waits for cousin Shisui to come visit him, because he’s the only one who listens. But that doesn’t happen either. When Itachi asks another one of his cousins, they tell him that Shisui is busy with Important Missions, and that he should be a good boy and not bother anyone with _Sasuke_ being so sickly.

Like it’s his fault that the new baby is a weakling. 

He sneaks into Mother’s room to meet _Sasuke_ , because unlike Itachi, he gets to be there all the time. Mother says Itachi is too old to sleep with her anymore, and that he needs to Respect People’s Privacy, so he can’t go into her room anymore without asking for permission first. Which, hah. As if they could ban him from any room in his own house. The crows would never let him live it down if he couldn’t go about as he pleased. 

Much to his annoyance, the crib is too tall for him. He considers using the edge for leverage to raise himself to the tips of his toes, but that doesn’t sound graceful. The crib is close to Mother’s dresser, so he climbs that and then looks down at _Sasuke_.

He is awake and not crying, which Itachi would have called impossible.

“Hello,” says Itachi. Father says he needs to say it, otherwise people will think he is Rude. 

_Sasuke_ doesn’t say anything back to him. No one bursts into the room to call him Rude. And all he does is open and close those big black eyes and wave his tiny arms around. Itachi bets he was never so useless.

“You’re boring,” he tells _Sasuke._

 _Sasuke_ ignores him. How Rude.

Itachi reaches into the crib and touches _Sasuke’s_ forehead with his index finger. 

_Sasuke_ starts crying.

Itachi hops off the dresser and runs out of Mother’s room. His heart is pounding by the time he reaches his bedroom. Sasuke is way too sickly! It’s not like Itachi hurt him. He doesn’t even remember what the little forehead felt like. 

He walks back to Mother’s room, making sure to knock this time. He’s sure that he will be sent away because _Sasuke_ is crying, but he has to make sure it is the normal type that the baby does all the time.

“Itachi,” Mother says when she sees him, with that little sigh that means that she’d rather him not be there. “Come here,” she adds, startling Itachi. “Come. It’s about time you meet your brother.”

And that’s how Itachi learns that as long as he pays attention to _Sasuke_ , Mother will pay attention to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [My blog](http://www.dynamicallyopposed.com/) is here.
> 
> Still working on my other story. Almost at the end :)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I put in close to 70 hours of work this week, so I didn't get much of a chance to write. I wanted to get something out for this weekend, and here we are with the fic I just babble in occasionally.
> 
> [Luvsanime02](http://archiveofourown.org/users/luvsanime02/pseuds/luvsanime02) helped me with the beginning paragraphs of this one, but the rest of the mistakes are mine.

The Nine-Tails attacks the day Minato-sensei’s son is born. 

Rin is off-duty when it happens, enjoying a hot bath in her new, jounin salary-worthy apartment. The bathroom alone is bigger than her old room had been, and she likes to luxuriate in the tub as she gazes at the sky visible from her bathroom window. One moment, she’s half-asleep, inhaling the perfumed bubbles made by the expensive bath salts an old lady conned her into buying during the last Festival of the Leaves, and the next her heart is pounding and her throat is choking on air.

She scrambles to her feet, slips on her uniform without bothering to towel the foam off her skin, and forces her legs to carry her out of her apartment. 

Out in the street, she doesn’t find the enemies she expects. The villagers are running around as though possessed, yelling obscenities at each other. Some brandish makeshift weapons—kitchen knives, rakes, hollow pipes. One enterprising housewife tries to hit Rin with a garbage can. Her skin dries too quickly, faster than it would have during the hottest summer days.

It’s hard not to retaliate, though she knows she’d kill any civilian with the most basic of attacks. Shinobi must get that something strange is happening, and most of them hide to keep themselves from slaughtering the village. More than once, Rin has to forcibly stop herself from getting between two villagers intent on killing each other. Any attacks on her person, no matter clumsy, would prompt her to retaliate with deadly force.

She slips from shadow to shadow, instinctively going towards the Tower. Perhaps she ought to be running to the hospital, but whatever or whoever is attacking Konoha (with mass-genjutsu? Is it the Uchiha?) is probably headed straight for Minato-sensei. 

Though it’s less crowded closer to The Tower, Rin’s anxiety ratchets upwards with every step forward she takes. The air is hotter and thicker, so much so that she swears a few falling leaves go up in flames before they hit the ground. The atmosphere is acrid, as though someone has dipped the world in sulfur and vinegar. Civilians are few and far in between, most of them huddled on the ground, scratching their shins bloody and crying out gibberish that Rin doesn’t fully understand. They're kids, she realizes though her own throbbing headache, but she can't bring herself to stop and help them. There are more shinobi around, but they’re hiding in the trees, between crevasses made by buildings that are too close together, or just shrouding themselves in genjutsu.

Rin jumps to a roof, then slips into one of the trees lining the road to The Tower. She runs into a few shinobi on the way, but they don’t stop to try and talk to her. Rin instinctively avoids them as well. She has no way of knowing who might be an enemy in disguise, and she doesn’t want to risk killing a fellow Leaf-nin in a fog of genjutsu-induced paranoia. Considering how many ninja she's personally treated, they shouldn't look so damned _alien_ to her.

An idea that should have broken through the smog all the way back in her apartment hits her. She pauses, climbs a few branches higher on the tree, and tries to focus her chakra despite the way her muscles twitch. 

_“Kai!”_

Nothing. If it really is a genjutsu, it’s one that Rin has no hope of breaking. She should just turn back, leave the village proper and hide in the forest for as long as it takes for things to go back to normal. She’s a competent chuunin—no, a jounin now—so she could survive on her own indefinitely in a land as temperate as Fire Country—

That’s more of the genjutsu. Rin is a Leaf ninja, a jounin medic. She could not live with herself if she wakes up tomorrow and realizes that she abandoned the village to maelstrom of artificial anxiety and confusion. The only thing left to do is square her shoulders and keep on going towards The Tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [My blog](http://www.dynamicallyopposed.com/) is here. With some talk about my job [here](http://www.dynamicallyopposed.com/2016/07/cool-things-under-microscope.html).


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, the good news is that due to nonsense beyond my control at work, I should have more free time on January and hopefully be able to get back on the habit of writing. The bad news is that I'm out of the habit of writing and forgot all I was doing.
> 
> Also, luvsanime02 probably beta-read this. I wrote it a while ago and realize this is just as good as anything else I'm gonna put out for this rambling. It probably would have made more sense if I made this chapter 19, but . . . eh whatever.

It takes Itachi a little while, but he learns to love _Sasuke_. At first, Sasuke is just the means to get Mother’s attention. Itachi rocks him and feeds him a bottle so Mother will look at him with exhausted gratitude and kiss his forehead. Sasuke himself is a nonentity, sleeping more than the housecat. 

Eventually, he stops hearing the name with a mental sneer, and his baby brother becomes just Sasuke; annoying, but at least as fun as his crows. The dynamic changes when Sasuke learns to do something besides cry, eat, and sleep; when he learns to flap his teeny arms happily whenever Itachi looks at him. Maybe before that. Probably the first time Sasuke beamed at the sight of Itachi staring down at him. People never look at Itachi with such naked joy.

Mother teaches him peek-a-boo. She swears that Itachi also loved the game as a baby, but he privately doubts it. It’s too silly. Sasuke acts like Itachi literally disappears whenever he covers his eyes. Very secretly, hidden even from himself, Itachi loves the trick. Sasuke always grins like Itachi just delivered the sun whenever he uncovers his face. Once, Itachi tried to modify the game and covered Sasuke’s eyes rather than his own, but that just made Sasuke cry. 

So he went back to the usual peek-a-boo, glad that Mother hadn't been around to witness that. Still, it turns out that Itachi hasn't been playing right. He can never do anything right.

“Why don't you make faces?” Mother asks one afternoon.

“What do you mean?”

“Smile, scrunch your nose, try to be funny,” says Mother. “Nobody likes a flat face, Itachi. You have to learn to smile.”

“Sasuke likes my face.” He’s probably the only one who does.

Mother sighs. Someone calls for her. She pats Itachi’s head and tells him to look after his brother.

Something’s going on with the adults. Cousin Shisui rarely visits him lately, and he’s always lost in his thoughts. That’s fine, since Itachi prefers silent companionship, but that’s not how Shisui used to be. Something’s just off with everyone. Itachi can tell, but he doesn't care that much, except for hoping that it lasts longer. He suspects Mother wouldn't leave him with Sasuke so much if she had more time.

The crows are a little jealous of Sasuke. It gets worse as Sasuke gets older and more fun to be around. When he’s strong enough to sit up and reach for things, Itachi dangles the trinkets the crows bring in front of his face. Sasuke laughs, like he laughs at everything, and tries to reach for them. A small smile tugs at the corners of Itachi’s lips.

Just when Sasuke learns to crawl, Father decides that Itachi should go to the Academy. “You can talk,” he tells Itachi. “There’s no reason to hide you anymore.”

Itachi had not been aware that his family was hiding him (well, not actively anyway). He stares at his father flatly.

“Shisui says that you are quite talented,” says Father. Then he pauses, and Itachi senses the space in the conversation he should fill up with noise, but he doesn't have anything to say. “The Yondaime also spoke highly of your talent.”

“Who?” 

Father frowns. That’s why Itachi tries not to talk. His words are always making people sad.

“I’ve been lenient with you,” says Fugaku, laying his hand on Itachi's shoulder. “You are my son and, despite your oddities, I love you.”

Itachi pouts. He doesn't see how Father can love him when he barely sees the man. He loves Sasuke, and he couldn't go days without spending time with him.

“But you’re getting too old for indulgences,” continues Fugaku. “When you are at the Academy, you’ll be representing the clan. I won't allow rebellion there. Do you understand?”

Itachi doesn't understand anything. What “rebellions” have his father all concerned? He doesn't even do anything. But he nods because that usually makes him go away.

The conversation stays with him, though. Of course, he’s always known that he would go to The Academy someday. It’s what all children in the Uchiha family do, but it’d always seemed like a far-off task, no closer to him than having a child someday, or going to war. And he’d never considered that he would be found lacking at The Academy either. No one ever spoke about it like it was a difficult thing, just tedious. He’d never thought about the specifics at all.

He goes to Sasuke’s room instead of running away to the tree he shares with the crows because it’s his job to watch Sasuke in the afternoons now, and Itachi does his job. The crows brought him a new batch of metal, probably from a landfill somewhere. They’re shinier than usual, though, as bright yellow as what Itachi imagines real gold looks like. He bets Sasuke will love them. 

Sasuke does. 

Itachi lays him down on the floor and dangles the yellow trinkets just out of his reach. Sasuke swings his tiny arms around and screams his delight. The conversation with Father melts away. Everything seems to melt away, so Itachi doesn't notice the atmosphere boiling around them until Sasuke lets out a shrill sob. 

It’s the desolate cry Itachi can't deal with, so he starts to get up to find an adult a second before the air gets trapped in his chest. His ears perk up as he freezes. Silence eats the space around them, except for Sasuke’s cries. There’s wind caressing Itachi’s arms, cooler than he’s ever felt, but it makes no sound as it wooshes through the window. Itachi stays there, might have stayed frozen there until the world ended or until he passed out from not breathing, but another sob from Sasuke snapped him awake. 

He grabs Sasuke, ignoring his cries for the moment. There has to be an adult in the house. Mother. Cousin Shisui. Even Father. Didn't he just talk to Father before? Not that he can remember what about.

But no one is in the house. He opens his mouth to yell for help, but a chilled, silent wind smothers his voice. Itachi’s not one for noise even in normal circumstances. He doesn't try to shout again.

Instead, he runs for the tree he shares with the crows. They will be safe there. No one knows about it besides Cousin Shisui.

It gets worse the further he goes into the forest. Sasuke cries louder. No other noise reaches them. Itachi looks around for squirrels, for crows, for his family, for _anything_ , but there’s only the cold and Sasuke’s tears. He expects to feel better when he reaches the hollowed-out tree, but it only gets harder to breathe. Suddenly, he is certain that if he can't get Sasuke to stop screeching, something will find them and _eat_ them.

“Please stop crying!” Itachi flinches at the sound of his own voice. It’s as shrill and desperate as Sasuke’s. 

The fear grips his throat tighter. He tries to breathe deeply, like Cousin Shisui had said he should to focus himself, but his breath stutters. Sasuke keeps screaming. Itachi squeezes his eyes shut, counts to ten, then lays Sasuke on his knees. He forces himself to ignore the noise, or lack thereof. Smells. The leaves still smell fresh, and the ground moist. His heart slows down. Sasuke lets out another shrill wheeze.

Itachi opens his eyes. Everything is red, but that’s immaterial. He stares down at Sasuke’s little face, searching for dark, huge eyes. It takes a moment, but Sasuke opens his eyes the next time he has to pause for breath.

“Stop it,” Itachi whispers, too low for Sasuke to hear.

It doesn't matter. Everything will be fine now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [I'm at tumblr now.](https://loudest-voice.tumblr.com/)


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas, everyone! Thanks to luvsanime02 for betaing like the first half of this. I wanted to get something out by Christmas, so I pushed this out this morning before going off to see family so like half of it is unedited.

Minato wakes up five days after his son is born. Though his head is swimming, he still tries to get up from the hospital bed and pull out the tubes he’s got everywhere. 

“Hokage-sama!”

He barely recognizes the woman’s voice. No. He recognizes it well enough to realize it’s _not_ Kushina, and his heart races. A firm hand wraps around his wrist as he writhes. He has just enough strength to grab a hold of it and flood the palm of his hand with chakra, wavering between bastardized Gentle Fist or raw Fire Transformation. Kushina is at death’s door. He has to _help_ her. Even if his limbs are as heavy as lead, he has to save her.

“Minato-sensei!” 

Only Kushina calls him by his first name anymore, though never with that title. It’s enough to make him pause, look up at Rin’s narrow, pained gaze, and fall back onto the bed. Rin gasps, wrenches away from him and covers her burned wrist with a chakra-glowing hand. 

“Sorry,” says Minato, then he coughs in a futile attempt to ease the scratchy ache gripping his throat. That tube he’d pulled out had been going down his nose, possibly to his belly. 

“Hokage-sama, do you need me to put you under?”

Minato huffs, but he forces himself to answer the question. He’s a dangerous fighter. Even weakened by disease and delirium, he could do serious damage to his subordinates. 

“No.” He shakes his head, takes stock of his body, winces at the feel of a catheter, and lies back on the bed. There are three ANBU black ops hiding in the room’s shadow, so tense that their bones are probably about to snap. “I’m okay, just. . . give me a moment.”

A moment to work up the courage to ask about Kushina. If his ANBU entourage is with him, watching over him as he lies on a hospital bed, then the attack. . . and the childbirth. . . They were over. He should ask about Kushina, but his breath stutters every time he tries.

“Hokage-sama.”

Minato startles, almost gasps, then recognizes Kakashi’s voice. Just Kakashi. He’d noticed Kakashi the moment he’d woken, of course, but again. . . it’s just Kakashi. Minato trusts Kakashi. 

Doesn’t he?

“Where’s Kushina?” he asks, without opening his eyes.

Nobody answers.

“Where’s Kushina?” He means to sound commanding, but his throat is as dry as sandpaper. It hurts to speak.

“Sensei. . .” Rin trails off. 

Minato’s heart is pounding. The monitor next to his bed shrieks out a beeping alarm. One of the ANBU fidgets in his shadow. Minato feels around his chest and rips off the monitors glued to his skin. The bedside monitor’s beeping morphs into a solid wail. “Turn that shit _off_!” 

Rin hurries to follow the command. 

Minato throws his arm over his eyes and heaves. Then he commands himself to even out his breath, to suck in air and hold it in his lungs for three seconds, then slowly let it out his mouth. He is not having a panic attack. He is _not_ having a panic attack. Minutes pass. Only the sound of his long breaths disturbs the room.

“Where’s Kushina?”

No one says anything. Minato’s about to bark out an order when someone walks closer to his bed. He knows it’s Kakashi before he uncovers his eyes and meets Kakashi’s dark gaze. His heart skips a beat. But that’s dumb. It’s just Kakashi. Kakashi without a mask and dressed in Uchiha colors, but still just _Kakashi_.

“Hokage-sama, you know where she is,” says Kakashi.

Minato’s glad he ripped off the heart monitor because he can pretend no one notices that his heart is trying to escape his chest. He freezes for a few seconds, long enough that a skilled fighter could get beneath his defenses, as if they couldn’t have while he slept, with tubes up his nose, in his vein, and even in his dick. He sucks in a shallow breath.

“We’ve got everything under control now, more or less,” says Kakashi. “Jiraiya-sama is acting as interim commander of the regular corp, and Danzo is commanding ANBU.” 

_I don’t care._ Minato would have said that out loud, but his throat is clogged with sobs.

“The noble clans - besides the Uchiha - are handling the rebuilding efforts and keeping the peace among civilians,” Kakashi drones on. “According to the Hyuuga, the death toll won’t exceed a thousand. The eastern side of the village got hit the hardest, especially the Uchiha. About eighteen percent of the clan is dead. ANBU is handling police work for now.”

That should be alarming. Minato squeezes his eyes shut. He needs the fucking catheter out. He needs to check his chakra levels, his flexibility, etc. But he can’t _move_.

“Kushina. . .”

Kakashi goes still as a statue and mercifully stops talking.

It’s Rin who works up the courage to speak. “I’m sorry, Sensei. She’s dead.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [I'm at tumblr now.](https://loudest-voice.tumblr.com/)


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a lot to [luvsanime02](http://archiveofourown.org/users/luvsanime02/pseuds/luvsanime02) for beta-reading as usual. I added a bit to the end that she didn't get to see, so any mistakes there are mine.
> 
> I think it's obvious by this point that I've lost control of the responding to comments thing. I'm trying to make it my New Year's resolution to answer one a day at random.

Obito’s only allowed to go about as he pleases because no one considers him a threat. Most of his cousins, Shisui in particular, are staying put in their houses. ANBU - _real_ ANBU, not the standard ones that wear their uniforms like it’s nothing and slap their masks to their hips in public - are perched all over the compound, so blatant that even Obito can sense them. If the beast had not razed through the Uchiha properties before slamming the center of the village, there might be enough Uchiha left to get fussy about the obvious surveillance. But it had, so the Uchiha are too busy burning their dead and supporting the survivors. 

The villagers don’t help. The other clans don’t help. Luckily, not helping is all they’re doing. Not doing. Obito bets that rumors are flying about where the Nine Tails has gone, whether it has _truly_ gone, and what if the Uchiha are waiting until everything gets worse to make their demands? They had brought the calamity to the village’s door, had they not? They’re crazy, right? Maybe they don’t even want anything. Maybe the Uchiha’s madness has reared its vicious head, as it does randomly, every other generation. 

Obito hates his family sometimes. All the nasty things that people say about them? Obito’s thought/felt/known them all at some point. He doesn’t see the Uchiha clan as a clansman is supposed to. Perhaps that’s why he’s not seen as an Uchiha clansmen, and so Danzo’s ANBU let him wander off. Or maybe they know that he is part of the Hokage’s team, kinda, and so they plan to spy on him. Either way, Obito leaves the Uchiha compound without any fuss and makes his way to the village proper. He has the Uchiha fan on his navy blue Uchiha shirt, and his headband wrapped around his forehead. 

He walks on the street, pace slow even for a civilian, assessing. No shinobi interacts with him. Civilians shoot him dirty looks, but look away when he meets their gaze. A woman hugs her infant so tight at the sight of him that it starts wailing. She startles, and tries to sush it, as though Obito’s red eyes (not that they’re standing close enough that she can see if his eyes are red) are going to bulge out of his skull, sprout teeth, and swallow them whole. 

It’s probably not a good idea to smile like a crazy person to himself. Not while the whole village is now on edge. 

If Danzo’s ANBU are following him, they’re at least bothering to hide. 

Obito shrugs to himself and heads to Minato-sensei’s home. He assumes that Kakashi is there, and Rin too, and he wants to see them. He wants to see _Kakashi_ , who disappeared during the chaos. (The Uchiha are saying he betrayed them. Obito hopes that Kakashi knows what he’s getting himself into, that there’s a plan that he’s not privy to. His clan has a lot of rage to burn through, and no safe target for it.) If Danzo’s lackeys are spying on Obito, then Minato-sensei’s guard will deal with them. Such a guard must still exist because someone seems to be following the Yondaime’s directives, or at least the directive not to annihilate the Uchiha at the earliest opportunity.

There are more ANBU than usual at the Hokage’s residence, but not a single one tries to stop Obito. Not even when he forgoes the front door and blatantly sneaks into the house via a window, intrigued by the sound of a screaming baby. Kushina’s kid had survived then. Rumors were that it hadn’t. 

“I don’t know why you have to just. . . word vomit about how everything’s gone to shit,” Rin is saying, and it’s the first time ever Obito’s heard that tone from her directed at sainted Kakashi, of all people. 

“I wasn’t _word vomiting_ ,” Kakashi responds. “I was updating our leader about the situation.”

They ignore Obito, just as the ANBU had. Obito doesn’t have enough energy to be mad about it. He notes that Kakashi’s still wearing an Uchiha shirt as though it’s a vague plot hint in a bad movie. The baby goes on screeching.

“His wife just died!”

“That was almost a week ago.”

Rin lets out a frustrated growl and pushes her fingers through her hair. She’s not wearing any makeup. The baby’s cries get more insistent.

“Shouldn’t you check on him?” Obito asks her, gesturing at the bassinet on the other side of the room.

“Why’re you telling me?” demands Rin, finally turning towards him. “You think just because I got titts I automatically know what to do with a baby?”

“Well. . .” _Yeah,_ Obito doesn’t actually say, because he isn’t as tone-deaf as Kakashi. “You’re a medic.”

“Not for infants!”

Kakashi - _Kakashi_ \- grunts and walks towards the bassinet. For one hysterical second, Obito assumes that Kakashi will smother the brat, but he just picks it up and brings it to his chest.

“He’s only a baby,” he says, voice soothing as he looks down at the bundle. Soothing. _Kakashi_. “Babies have simple needs.”

In under a minute of humming and moving around, Kakashi’s gotten the baby to stop screaming, which seeps the annoyance out of Rin like a genjutsu trap. That’s great. That’s amazing. Kakashi is good with babies. Why wouldn’t he be?

“We’re not the ones who did it, y’know?” says Obito, not looking at either of them. He hates his family, but they wouldn’t do this. They’re as scared of the bijuu as anyone.

“Obito, we know _you_ didn’t,” says Rin. 

Obito doesn’t need to look up to feel her pity.

“That much is obvious,” murmurs Kakashi, soft and careful so the the baby doesn’t wake. 

It really isn’t, not to the rest of the village. But if Kakashi thinks so, then so does Minato-sensei, which means the Uchiha still have a shot at survival.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [I'm at tumblr now.](https://loudest-voice.tumblr.com/)


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My vacation is almost over. Still getting in the swing of things. As usual, thanks to luvsanime02 for beta-reading.

Minato spends the first two days after regaining consciousness flipping through reports, pretending to read them. People keep updating him on the situation, Danzo included, and he keeps approving everything that doesn’t sound too permanent. That niggles at the back of his neck - Danzo’s always trying to wrest control of the village; he should be careful - but he doesn’t really care as much as he should. His thoughts are circling around each other, like he’s trying to solve a problem but skipping a crucial step. If he just keeps ruminating on it, he’ll find the spot that needs tweaking, and it will all be alright.

“Your baby’s doing well,” Rin tells him at some point during the first week. “Gaining weight already, no problems with the wet nurse we found.”

“The baby.” A light goes off in Minato’s head, like he’s a cartoon from one of those kids’ shows Kushina liked so much.

“Yeah, he’s fine,” Rin says quickly. She hurries after him when he rushes to the guest room. Where he’d ordered someone (Rin?) to put the baby. “Sir!”

“It’s in his Seal,” says Minato. “The way to fix this is in his Seal.” The baby is sleeping, wrapped in a blanket that Kushina embroidered for him. The burgundy flower pattern stops Minato in his tracks, but only for a second. He reaches for the blanket and starts to unwrap the kid, eager to examine the Seal that Kushina had barely let him glance at. He does his best to be gentle, but the baby starts screeching anyway. Behind him, Rin pauses, tense and not bothering to hide it. The ANBU hiding in the room’s shadows slide out into the open. “I'm not gonna hurt him,” snaps Minato. “I haven't lost my fucking mind.”

The baby’s cheeks are as red as a pepper by the time Minato has his belly uncovered. It’s smooth and soft except for the umbilical stump dried up on its belly button.

“Minato-sensei, please step away from the baby,” says Rin.

“Shouldn't you be in the hospital?” There’s a way to make the Seal reveal itself. Yes, it would hurt, but the baby wouldn't remember it.

Someone flickers into the room. Whoever it is gives Rin enough of a confidence boost that she takes a step towards the baby. Minato looks up and meets Jiraiya’s lined face.

“I think you had plenty of time to settle,” says Jiraiya.

Minato could leap over Rin and the baby and fucking _strangle_ him. His nostrils flare as he takes a noisy breath. Rin sneaks a glance at him. Her cheeks are as white as paper under her makeup, and her brown eyes wide as saucers. She holds the baby to her chest as he screams, reaching for Kushina’s blanket before stepping aside. The baby goes on screaming. His shrill cries pierce Minato’s ears even after Rin disappears behind the door. The ANBU melt back into the shadows.

“Are you gonna let Danzo - _Danzo_ \- seize power?” demands Jiraiya. “Is that what Kushina would have wanted?”

“Don't come here and talk to me about what Kushina would have wanted,” spits Minato. Kushina had wanted Uzushio, ocean waves and sea shanties, shells and fish and exploring, a huge family where everyone owned everything and nothing, and that blasted _baby_. Minato couldn’t give her back a culture swallowed up by war, so he’d hoped she’d settle for a baby. He’d figured it wouldn't even be that much work for him.

Fuck. He’s going to start crying.

“He’s talking about decimating the Uchiha,” says Jiraiya, “as a signal of our strength to other villages, and to deter any other clans from gaining airs.”

“Oh?” Minato feels like being an asshole for a little bit. Now seems as good a time as any. “You don't like the idea?”

“Don't get cute now.”

“Why’re you even here?” Minato sighs. “I could’ve fucking used you, y’know, a _week_ ago.”

“The world doesn't revolve around you.”

“Or this village,” says Minato. He should throw something in his old sensei’s face, even if it won't bother Jiraiya at all. “You’d have my job if it did, wouldn't you?”

“The Uchiha wouldn't have gone for that,” says Jiraiya.

“Guess that won't matter pretty soon.” It doesn't already.

“Don't let your rage make decisions for you,” says Jiraiya, striding forward.

If he tries to grab Minato’s arm, Minato swears to the demon inside his son that he’ll rip Jiraiya’s eyes out.

“They’re not the ones who did this,” continues Jiraiya. He knows enough not to touch Minato. “Not all of them, anyway. If things go south as fast as I think they will, we’re gonna need them.”

“I know they didn't do this.”

“Some of them might have--”

“--No.” Minato narrows his eyes, then takes a step backwards. He’s finally waking up. Jiraiya’s always been good at pissing him off, and that’s better than despairing. “I didn't say they _wouldn't_ do this; I said they _didn't_.” It would be nice if they had, if Minato had a whole group of people to blame this on, but it just doesn't fit.

“Then Kushina lost control of the Beast during labor?”

“Yes, but because . . .” There are ANBU watching, and Minato’s ashamed to admit that he can't be sure they’re all his. Not after he’s spent days acting the fool. “Kakashi!” he barks. Time to get things under control.

The boy flickers behind Jiraiya, mask on, Uchiha crest visible on the collar of his standard ANBU undershirt. The clan hasn't kicked him out. Minato hasn't asked if that’s because they trust him, or because they’re scared. Probably both. Hopefully both.

“Get me Danzo, the other village elders, the clan heads, and whoever the hell else might be important,” orders Minato, striding towards the door. He ignores Jiraiya. He’s not someone Minato can count on. Not anymore.

As Kakashi nods and flickers away, Minato hopes that he didn't approve anything too stupid during his fugue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [I'm at tumblr now.](https://loudest-voice.tumblr.com/)


End file.
